Christian authors writing on sexuality talk about sex as more than genital sex (i.e. erotic sexual behaviors) but also gender. There is something "sexual" about just being male.
It is in this context that I used the term "sexual" in "unbridled adolescent male sexual energy."
Over the last week, I have woken up with an erection four times. Along with that is the desire to masturbate and have an orgasm. And along with that are images of naked women swimming in my head.
I don't even know who I am anymore.
Thank God I have a wife who can satisfy my new heterosexual libido. Otherwise, I think I WOULD go out and find a girl and do it. Over and over again.
I never understood how men could do it before. This "wham, bam, thank you ma'am." How can anyone have sex with another person, and then it's all over and they want to go away?
I once asked Brother M what his constant desires for women was like, and he said, "it's just a pure thrill." Kind of like riding a roller coaster. "How shallow," I replied, as the haughty more-sensitive-than-thou SSA man.
But I understand it now. I see women, I see their sex, and I want them. Just for plain sex. Not intimacy, not love, just plain sex. Yah, yah, it's intimate and all, but NOTHING like the warm, fuzzy, oh-love-me-all-over feelings that I used to get when fantasizing about men. Now, it's just a raw, sexual, I-just-want-to-hump-you feeling.
How shallow, this new me.
Anyway, because my wife and mother-in-law are the coolest women on the face of this planet, I told them how I was feeling.
And mom said, "you know, what do adolescent boys think about? They just want to score! It's kind of like that, isn't it?"
Remember over the last two posts, I talked about anger, and this wanting to compete and to fight? Well, I think it's all part of the same package. I think what I am experiencing is unbridled adolescent male sexual energy.
: Wolf-like howl! :
(Thanks, mom-in-law, yous da bess.)