Brother K has SSA and is younger than me. [I use caps to denote if a brother is younger (b) or older (B) than me.]
I love brother K like I love my own brother, like I love my own son, like I love my own "boy-soul" within me that is fast growing up.
When I think of brother K, I get an aching in my heart. I long to see him come to experience God's full healing in his life, to the point where he no longer seeks out men in a sexual way to find the male-love he so needs and deserves.
Brother K feels things for me that I have felt for Brother A. It's uncanny to me how similar they are. Brother K wants to be hugged, loved, and cherished by me--just the way that I have wanted to be hugged, loved, and cherished by Brother A. Brother K wants wants me to hold his hand, like a father to a son--just the way Brother A's hand turned into my father's hand when he held mine.
I was struck when brother K said that it would break his heart if the intimacy between him and I turned sexual. I said the same thing to Brother A just a few days ago! Only I was a lot more dramatic about it: "I'd kill myself if our relationship ever became sexual." (Brother A assured me that he could be trusted.)
I understand brother K. This is not a platitude. I really, really understand brother K. And I love him. Like Brother A loves me.
I wonder. How many of us men with SSA struggles are longing for such deep non-sexual male-to-male intimacy? Half? Three-quarters? All?